


Diary of The Demented Demon Angst Mechanics

by 7PercentSolution, J_Baillier



Series: On Pins And Needles [3]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Author Commentary, Authors' notes, Autism, Autism Spectrum, Awkward Sex Talk, Depression, Dissociation, Drugs, Established Relationship, Fic Meta, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Major Illness, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Miscommunication, Mycroft Being a Good Brother, Mycroft also being a meddling busybody, Pain, Physical Therapy, Rehabilitation, Romance, Sherlock's Past, Sherlock's Violin, The Making of, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, although they're not sure what it is they've established just yet, casefic, friends to lover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-11
Updated: 2017-05-11
Packaged: 2018-10-30 10:19:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10874745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/7PercentSolution/pseuds/7PercentSolution, https://archiveofourown.org/users/J_Baillier/pseuds/J_Baillier
Summary: The making of "The Breaking Wheel" and "On the Rack", as reported from the inside.





	1. An Interview With J. Baillier & 7PercentSolution

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 1 contains an excessive amount of authors rambling about their work.
> 
> Chapter 2 lists all tumblr photo posts related to the story.

 

 

> **_“He doesn't know which is worse, a past he can't regain or a present that will destroy him if he looks at it too clearly. Then there's the future. Sheer vertigo.”_ **
> 
> **_– Margaret Atwood –_ **

 

Jessica Baillier is known for her extensive Author's Notes, and 7PercentSolution is no stranger to footnotes in fic herself. After a story of this length, some behind-the-scenes ramblings definitely felt like the thing to do. Since there are two authors, an interview format seemed practical.

_Abbreviations used: TBW = The Breaking Wheel, OTR = On the Rack, GBS = Guillain-Barré syndrome, ASD = Autism spectrum disorder, SPD = Sensory processing disorder, ITU = Intensive Treatment Unit (ICU in the US), PTSD = post-traumatic stress disorder_

 

**Where did the idea for the series come from?**

**_Jessica:_** I never planned on making a series out of this, even when I was already writing the first story. The big inspiration for TBW were my own experiences working as an ITU doc years ago. I had also been wondering what medical issues could possibly remain unexplored in this fandom, since there's so much medical H &C already published. I didn't know it at the time of writing the draft, but a story actually did already exist where it's John who gets GBS – a reader told me about it in TBW's comments section.

Inspiration hit early one morning en route to work, but I wrote the original TBW draft with mixed feelings – I had cared for patients with GBS, and those harrowing experiences left me conflicted as to whether it was actually ethical to use this as a plot device. Then, I realized that I simply needed to treat the subject matter with the same respect I sought with cerebral aneurysms in "The Road of Bones". Fic allows me tell people about such illnesses, to discuss medical ethics and to offer a glimpse into hospital life on the side of telling a story. I don't see myself as writing educational fiction, but raising awareness of such stuff is a really nice perk.

It wasn't just the purely medical side of GBS that interested me – its unique nature offered a chance to explore themes such as communication and patient autonomy. How would the illness affect John and Sherlock's relationship, and could having less means to communicate actually mean more openness and more honesty?

During the writing process, more themes began creeping in: details from Sherlock's childhood and his 'black years', his addiction and mental health issues, and his relationship with Mycroft. Some of that was dealt with in The Breaking Wheel, but OTR allowed us to dig deeper. A _lot_ deeper. What was supposed to be about a hundred pages of GBS recovery post-hospital discharge, turned into a massive thing with no less than three? or four? or five? subplots.

 ** _7Percent:_** There was never an idea for a “series” – I just liked The Breaking Wheel so much as a reader.  It had dealt with many of the same issues that I write about in my stories: addiction, communication, ASD Sherlock, and his relationship with Mycroft, as well as John. Since I got coaxed into being a beta for TBW I was getting a sneak peek at the last chapters, so knew how it was going to end.  For me, it left so many MORE questions to be answered that I just started a bombing run, telling J that if she stopped now, I’d come after her with a shotgun.

 

**Who suggested co-authorship, and how did that conversation go?**

**_7Percent:_** That’s my fault.  I basically wanted her to write a sequel, one that did justice to the fact that recovery from GBS would be SO hard for Sherlock, and that the relationship with John would make it even harder.  She baulked at first and said she wasn’t willing to do it after the emotional drainage of TBW. So, I sort of thought, well, if she doesn’t want to write it, then maybe we could do it together. If she’d refused, then my next stratagem would have been to say, let me write it then.  I’ve not told her this before… that would have been the gun to her head, but luckily I didn’t need to resort to it.

 ** _Jessica:_** She made me an offer I couldn't refuse *laughs*. Just as Seven said, I was initially very reluctant to do a sequel at all, mostly because writing a story as big and emotionally heavy as BTW sure takes a toll on a writer. 7Percent had been egging me on to try my hand at casefic for ages (the cases in my stories have mostly tended to have a more of a window-dressing quality than a proper major role in the storyline) but I doubted my abilities. 7Percent, on the other hand, excels at that very genre. I'd also class her as the queen of Mycrofting, so doing Mycroft's POV with her was very tempting. We're both also fascinated by neuropsychiatry, and if I'm not mistaken, it was those issues of Sherlock's which actually drew Seven to write Sherlock fic?

 ** _7Percent:_** Yes, starting with _Talking When You’re Not There_ , I had been drawn to write in this fandom (which remains my one and only fandom) because I thought that a lot of fanfiction I was reading did not fully get the significance of Sherlock being on the Spectrum. There was a lot of misunderstanding about it- and I am afraid that I am a bit like Sherlock shouting at Anderson: “Do your research!”  Neurodiversity is something I have always been interested in, and the one and a half million words I have written explore the issue from a medically informed POV.

 

**7Percent - it seems like a daunting prospect to jump into the world of another author's story, especially since your own works form a massive, coherent narrative. What sorts of initial worries did you have?**

**_7Percent:_** I’d never considered writing with someone else.  But I was so determined that the story be written and the truths exposed about just how hard it is to recover from that kind of illness whilst trying to establish a loving relationship.  Whatever my initial anxieties were, they just didn’t matter.  I must admit it was really, really odd to be doing this at the start, especially as J is a Johnlocker and I was not.  In the beginning, I tended to think that it was “her” story and I was sort of a script consultant.  But after about three or four chapters, we started getting the hang of it. And we learned from each other.  There were times when I sort of tip-toed around, not sure the degree to which I could “interfere”, but then we got to know each other better, we realised that we each have strengths that answer each other’s weaknesses.  Nine months later, it’s hard to see where the joints are.

 ** _Jessica:_** I just figured that if she's nuts enough to want to do this with me, she'll do the homework. Having betaed TBW Seven already knew the storyline really well, which was a good starting point.

 

**Was TBW an easy story to write?**

**_Jessica:_** Depends on what you mean by easy. The first draft practically poured out once I got started – I think I wrote it, from start to finish, in a weekend. Easy in an emotional sense it was not; as a reviewer put it, it's Sherlock trapped inside his head with his demons. Not a very nice place, that. Not as bad as " _Smile Like A Paper Cut_ ", though!

  
  
**What about OTR, in comparison?**

 ** _Jessica:_** It took us about eight months from the initial planning discussions to finishing a draft of the last unwritten chapter. Some parts were easy, some very hard. Despite real life happening on the side, we managed to very consistently keep working our arses off practically every day. We had almost daily online chat story planning sessions, which were probably the funnest part of the process along with receiving drafts of new stuff from Seven. She kept constantly surprising me and keeping us in order! Some chapters were on their eighth or ninth version before we finally declared them finalised.

 ** _7Percent:_** “Funnest”… smirk. There was also the pleasure of making a Scandinavian friend whose love of the English language made me smile.  I'm the BritPicker and Grammar Policeman of the team. And I'm the nitpicker, too-so I can say that we had actually drafted the whole thing between August and the premier of Series 4 on 1 January, so that's nearly 300,000 words in four and half months.  At least in rough shape, anyway; the rest of the time has ben spent editing, honing and fixing things as we published. It's been fun.  
  
**_Jessica:_** We initially bonded over writing, and from that grew a well-rounded friendship that happens both online and in real life. We've even sat in the same room and edited a chapter, which was…. very strange.

  
  
**Does OTR sound more like J. Baillier or 7PercentSolution?**

 ** _7Percent:_**  Well, in one sense, my readers would say J, rather than me, because all of my other stories fit into each other and have their own universe, which does not have Johnlock in it. But, on the other hand, there is an underlying structure to OTR that would be familiar to those who know some of my longer works. 

 ** _Jessica:_** I'd say neither _and_ both. There are bits in OTR that we were pretty sure people were going to point at and say, " _I'm sure 7Percent did this one_ ", or that I did, and that they'd be completely wrong. I'm pretty sure did some of my absolute best Mycroft in OTR, and 7Percent johnlocked as though she'd been doing it for years.

Chapter 1 is pretty J.Baillieristic, whereas chapter 2 opens on a more 7Percentish note, but after that I feel like our styles really began to merge. We did want to avoid sounding like we were taking turns. There are chapters which we wrote pretty much 50/50, and chapters where one author was more in charge. We both edited and re-edited and fine-tuned and tweaked all chapters. We also had the help of a diligent proofreader, Lockedinjohnlock, who also podficced TBW and gave us some excellent pointers that went well beyond just hunting typos and groaning over grammar.

 ****  
  
How realistic is the series in terms of the severity of Sherlock's illness?

 ** _Jessica:_** In all honesty, what I cooked up is extremely rare, and pretty horrendous. Most GBS patients don't end up on a ventilator, and Sherlock's case combines several known major types of the syndrome. Our boy doesn't do anything by halves, does he... There is a documentary video on Youtube on a patient whose case does mirror his case in severity; the link can be found in the TBW comments section.

As for the aftermath depicted in OTR, the issues illustrated in OTR do affect patients whose initial GBS has been severe. In Sherlock's case they're further complicated by personal factors, such as his mental health issues and his neuroatypicality.

A very significant and distressing issue affecting GBS patients in an ITU setting is loss of a means to communicate. In a study done on such patients who have been on a ventilator illustrated that the loss of their voices made them feel as though they had also lost their sense of themselves as a person, and that the loss of communication was the most difficult thing to cope with. Studies also show that up to half of GBS patients experience frightening hallucinations, and personality changes and psychotic experiences are also a significant issue. Depending on the study, up to one in four survivors will have had a reactive psychotic episode, and those were associated with ventilator treatment, severe muscular weakness and multiple cranial nerve dysfunction. Curiously enough, one documented coping strategy employed by survivors during the worst of the illness is creating imaginary worlds where they can escape in order to prevent their personalities from disintegrating further. Sherlock has illustrated as canonically having some degree of dissociative tendency to start with, so that's why it occurred to me that he may have felt that such an escape carried a risk of further alienation from the world. The risk factors Molly lists to John in TBW regarding ICU delirium are supported by research.

 ** _7Percent:_**  I was pretty horrified by the thought of how someone like Sherlock would deal with the sensory issues of GBS, and TBW gave that plenty of room to run.  His alienation from “the transport” would not miraculously improve once the autoimmune reaction had run its course, and rehabilitation would IMHO prove to be really challenging for someone who has this kind of relationship with his body. So, being discharged from the National was, to me, only the very first step. The mental health sequelae – the risk of severe depression in particular – would be significant, which is what drew me to OTR.

 ** _Jessica:_** Anyone interest to learn more about the experiences of patients with severe GBS and how it impacts their lives after the acute recovery phase will benefit from having a look at [the study I've been covertly quoting here](https://lra.le.ac.uk/bitstream/2381/8604/1/2010harrisoncvclindocpsy.pdf).   


**  
** **Whether Sherlock is on the autistic spectrum varies a lot in fan fiction. In this series, it seems to be a major talking point?**

**_7Percent:_**  Well, as I said above, this is my genre. I have spent the past four years digging into medical journals, talking to medical professionals, and to those who are on the Spectrum to try to write authentically.  And the number of ASD readers who have PM’d me or commented,  as well as their family members and medical professionals, to say that this is how it is for them, make me determined to keep writing my Sherlock this way. It’s about changing people’s perceptions and their understanding.  It’s the electrical current under all of my writing.

 ** _Jessica:_** We discussed ASD a lot during the course of the writing process, especially in relation to sexuality and how the late symptoms of the GBS might pose huge challenges with the associated SPD. We learned some fascinating stuff about modern neuroscience, especially about the regulation of consciousness when brain processing centres are overwhelmed by too much information. We tried to make the meltdowns realistic, and to keep them in line with stuff we knew about the brain, stress, information processing and ASD. I find this aspect of Sherlock absolutely fascinating, and have dealt with it in several stories myself, and it was one of the major reasons for teaming up with 7Percent for OTR – she's quite the expert. It's been very heart-warming to hear from readers (even from professionals working with autistic patients) that many have felt we've done justice to the subject matter.

  
  
**You mentioned mental health issues. How would you characterize them?**

 ** _7Percent:_**  It is canon that Sherlock is an addict, whether recovering or not.  And, substance abuse or self-medication is a big issue for lots of neuroatypicals.  As are social isolation, depression and communication issues, plus that catch-all general anxiety.  In someone who is as clever as Sherlock, all of the above could be a toxic combination. We know he had some tough times in his life before John, hence the term “danger nights”. All of that would be horribly accentuated by the post-ITU PTSD that I had come across in my readings about GBS.

 ** _Jessica:_** Depression and anxiety related to both his slow and arduous recovery and what is likely post-ITU PTSD and post-intensive care syndrome. He also has self-destructive coping mechanisms and a pathological body/mind dichotomy. In this universe, he was once hospitalized against his will for acute psychosis, which may well have been triggered or worsened by his drug use, at the bottom of which was psychotic-level depression. His tendency for dissociation is actually somewhat linked to the ASD, and that came to play as early as in TBW.

 

**Why is Sherlock so unwilling to accept help?**

**_7Percent:_**  He has a lot of trust issues, and it doesn't help that those who are not on the Spectrum can't identify with what it is like for him to navigate the world, and to have to deal with his sensory processing issues.  It strikes at the heart of what a lot of autistics feel about the ableist community: why should they accept what others say is “good” for them?  Most of Sherlock's prior experience of _help_ would be so utterly unhelpful, no matter whether it was given with the best of intentions.  All of that is covered in my stories, so for me OTR was just a logical extension of that character.

 ** _Jessica:_** He has lived with depression and anxiety all his life – it's the devil he knows. He's willing to endure a lot of it in order to avoid taking the tiniest risk of losing John. He's been lonely for such a long time that he's willing to do anything to prevent having to go back to the life he's had prior. He fears, above all, for his control over his life being wrenched away, which has already happened to him at least twice that we know of (2007, and the GBS).

  
  
**John is grappling with some issues of his own, too.**

 ** _Jessica:_** Definitely. It's hard for him to decide when to push, when to step back, when to take on a doctor's role and when to avoid doing just that. He battles with his own helplessness and the life choices which have allowed him to sidestep the emotional problems in relationships. In his profession, he wants to focus on the more concrete ways in which to help others. He thinks he's rubbish at all touchy-feely stuff, but he does eventually step up to the task, once he accepts that things aren't going very well. How can he award Sherlock with the trust Mycroft never seems to think the man worthy of, and at the same time make sure Sherlock doesn't go and make an ever worse mess out of their lives? How much help should he allow Mycroft to offer?

 ** _7Percent:_**  John is in a complex, combined position of friend, wanna-be-lover, caregiver and doctor, as well as back-up and blogger for his consulting detective. So many roles! And, they often contradict each other. A major thing I like about the Mofftiss John is that he isn’t stupid, and he has issues of his own. The PTSD, the anger management issues. He might look like an amicable and approachable guy to most people when they first meet him, yet Sherlock soon recognises that this is just a front. What lies under the oatmeal sweaters is a man who would kill on moral principle on the first night they were together.  There are just as many contradictory impulses driving John Watson as there are Sherlock, which to me makes their relationship fascinating.

 ** _Jessica:_** In addition to all that, John "notgay" Watson unsurprisingly has a bit of a sexuality crisis going on in OTR. Plus there are identity issues that have to do with others seeing Sherlock as the rock star and him the trusty sidekick.

 

**In OTR, we get to see Sherlock using his chemistry skills. What was the inspiration for giving that aspect of his life such a prominent role?**

**_Jessica:_** We've got a TV series where the main characters are a medical doctor and a graduate chemist, yet they get to do very little with their respective knowledge bases on screen. I like fixing such things with fic, although the chemistry angle was new. Not for you, though, 7Percent? You've done this sort of thing a lot, haven't you?

 ** _7Percent:_** I’ve developed a whole story cycle called _Periodic Tales_ that allows Sherlock to use his chemistry knowledge. It’s one of the most fun to write because it lets me indulge my scientific research interests, but apply them to case fic. I got to play with a lot of chem lab equipment in OTR: always fun!

 ** _Jessica:_** Still, even all those fancy machines couldn't compete with John asking silly questions. Conductor of light and all that. Seven takes her science seriously – she had me scrambling to revise some of my old medical school textbooks so that I could keep up with the more chemistry-heavy bits she had drafted…

 ****  
  
How did the idea for the case in OTR come about?

 ** _7Percent:_** When J suggested the first outline of the case fic (and, yes, folks, she was the one who came up with the steroids and poisoning) I just went to town on how it could be done.

 ** _Jessica_** : Even though it originally had nothing whatsoever to do with TBW, and we hadn't uttered a word about the sequel yet, the original idea for something related to fitness did come to me at a Zumba class. I can't even exercise in peace without our boys popping into my brain! Honestly…

I think the original idea had something to do with the boys going undercover as fitness instructors. Let's be thankful that I never wrote that one.

 ** _7Percent:_**  And that just about sums up how we work together. Never in a million years would I have put them into the world of gyms, personal trainers or fitness fans.  But once I swallowed and said, well maybe... She was off like a butterfly, leaving me to get my net out and follow.

 ** _Jessica:_** I wanted the case to reflect some of the larger themes we were tackling. The gist of it are people who see their bodies as machines, something to be endlessly moulded and altered to their liking, acting as though these bodies can withstand anything. It's a deeply disconnected and hateful way to live. There's a short scene where John catches Sherlock googling experimental therapies for GBS which leads to a revealing discussion about how worryingly much Sherlock sympathises with such a mind set.

 

**The murder weapon is a link to Arthur Conan Doyle, isn't it?**

**_7Percent:_** Well, this was a case of J painting us into a case fic corner- and I had to come up with a means of poisoning related to cardiac issues. I'd already used gelsemium before in an earlier story of my own in _Periodic Tales_ (it has been used for real in London regarding two murders of Russian dissidents), so it became the solution for me. The challenge was figuring out how Sherlock would discover this without having prior knowledge of the chemical processes involved. It is a MOST interesting alkaline compound!  And when I was researching the process, I had come across the link to AC Doyle's own experience of testing it on himself when he was a medical student.  So, I could not resist using it again.

 

**7Percent – your own stories do not feature a romantic partnership or courtship between John and Sherlock. What was is like visiting the other side?**

**_7Percent:_** As a Johnlock virgin, I was a bit tentative at first.  I’m not a fan of gratuitous sex, and some of the fandom does just use this pairing as a vehicle to write porn.  For me, sex should be part of a relationship, and once J had established the possibility in TBW, well, we knew we had to make it authentic.

 ** _Jessica:_** I think Seven embraced the concept with relish, to which I really tip a hat, because not only was this her first Johnlock, this is the most.... graphic story your truly has ever done when it comes to The Sex. In our initial negotiation about the possibility of co-authorship, I asked Seven how she felt about the possibility of sex, and her reply was, I quote: " _Sex, when it comes, will be subtle and British_." That confirmed that we were on the same page, and really helped me to say yes to working together. Some of the sex scenes actually turned out to be much less subtle than I would have anticipated…

 ** _7Percent:_**  Too much of the writing in the fandom looks at sex from the … um, well- SEX point of view, with the long lurid details written out. As someone who has had a lively sex life while being happily married for 37 years, I sort of take a different view. Sex is just one way of expressing a relationship of intimacy. And getting _that_ right was challenging for John and Sherlock, who both come at their relationship with sort of dysfunctional experiences of sex without a proper relationship in place.

 ** _Jessica:_** One thing I found very interesting was imagining how sex would feel for someone with Sherlock's unusual brain. Hence his POV for much of the proceedings. Why can't I pick easier characters to write about? I sure as hell am not a thirtysomething (arguably) gay British genius bloke on the spectrum.

 ** _7Percent:_**  I think I might have been, in a previous life!

 ** _Jessica:_** I like to think I was Cleopatra.

In all seriousness: those scenes were the hardest I've ever had to write, honestly. There will never be an explicit porn-without-plot fic written by me, and I envy those who can achieve such feats. I wrote about two sentences of that chapter per day for the scenes in the final chapters, as opposed to my usual 3-10 pages drafted per day. It got easier in the course of the process, and once I realised that sex scenes are, in terms of the technical side of writing, nothing more and nothing less than any other sorts of scenes. That helped me come to the follow-up conclusion that I needed to focus on what we wanted to say with those particular scenes, instead of getting hung up on the technical details.

I was very adamant from the start that the sex was not to be the endgame here – _happiness_ is. The idea was that only after other aspects of a relationship start to work, the sex could, and would, follow, and start to work. This relates to another thing I really wanted to avoid – portraying sex as some sort of a magic healing button.

I've never been very interested in fluff, or what _'established relationship_ ' usually means in fic – what draws me to 'ships', if you will, is the pining, the slow burn, the unrequited, the unspoken, the in-between. In OTR I wanted to explore that state in a relationship where the important words have been said, but the minutiae of daily life as a couple has not yet been negotiated. It's an exciting, precarious, dangerous stage where so much could still go wrong. Even when things seem to go very, very right (case-in-point: the earth-shattering blowjob John receives), if the reciprocation and the emotional side haven't caught up, there _will_ be a problem.

 

**  
Rock climbing and horseback riding. Where did all _that_ come from?**

**_7Percent:_** I knew that J had been a rider, given her reaction to my story _Musgrave Blaze_ , but when she proposed climbing, I was amazed – she didn’t know at the time that I’d been a trad climber in my younger days, climbing Capitol Peak in the Colorado Rockies. So, it was a love-at-first sight idea.

 ** _Jessica:_** After being stuck in the hospital for eighteen bloody chapters, I was certain that Sherlock and John would want to do something completely different! It was great fun taking them out of their usual settings and coming up with something unorthodox when it came to physical rehabilitation. I liked the idea that Sherlock would hate all the standard PT options and dismiss them, and that John would have to get creative. John really was willing to try anything, to turn every stone in order to help. The lovely story Seven just mentioned, " _Musgrave Blaze_ ", puts Sherlock on a horse, and who the hell could resist a mental image like that?

 ** _7Percent:_**  I’ve never done indoor climbing or bouldering, so the idea intrigued me. And there aren’t any mountains near enough to inner London to be conceivable, so I got the fun of inventing First Ascent and the Vault, which was a blast.

 ** _Jessica:_** As a climber, I mostly stuck to indoor walls, so I was familiar with that setting already.

 

**Are the non-canon locations in the story real places?**

**_Jessica:_** The National Hospital for Neurology and Neurosurgery is a real place, and served as practically the sole location for TBW. For the fictional Harwich Manor, I looked at posh drug rehab places in England and Scotland, and the end result is a mix of many of those. Maress&Thornton is fictional, as is The Vault. First Ascent is partly based on an indoor climbing arena where I learned the ropes (literally). 7Percent is a wizard with Google Earth; she scouted out a suitable area for Harwich manor to exist in, and she did the same for The Vault and many of our case-related locales, too.

 ** _7Percent:_** I live on Google earth and Google street view. It helps that I lived in London for a decade.

 ** _Jessica:_** I did some location scouting the last time I went to London. I'm relieved I didn't end up getting as ASBO for all my sneaking around and taking photos at The National!

 ****  
  
What sort of consultants did you have for the series?

 ** _Jessica:_** I was privileged to receive a lot of advice from a speech pathologist for TBW. For OTR we had help from both a medical pathologist, and a forensic one. Emma221b along with 7Percent betaed TBW and Emma also did that story's medBritpicking. As I've already mentioned, the magnificent Lockedinjohnlock was our proofreader and TBW's podficcer.

Most of the members of the little writers' group we're both part of provided much-needed cheerleading – and friendly grumbling when we refused to give them sneak previews at a time when the whole thing was still just a glorious mess... Or maybe 'mess' isn't the word we're looking for. _'Random pile of scenes with bits of what might be a case sprinkled on top'_ might have been a better description at that point.

 ** _7Percent:_** I second the shout out of love for our close coven of fanficdom.  We've tested a few ideas on them, and got more than a few bricks thrown at John, Sherlock and even us. It is part of the pleasure of fanfic writing, being able to bounce ideas off other people, without feeling too "precious" about our own efforts.

 ** _Jessica:_** Our proofreader Lockedinjohnlock was an excellent weathervane when it came to the angst level, and it was due to her comments that major changes were done to (for instance) the sequence of scenes and even entire chapters at the very end.

 ****  
  
What can you tell us about the collection of original characters in the story?

 ** _Jessica:_** There are four somewhat prominent original supporting characters. One of them, Jonathan Baxter, was introduced early in TBW. His family history is a playful reference to one of my earlier stories, a series called " _You Go To My Head_ ", where a doctor named Allen Baxter (Jonathan's father) serves as the villain of the first story. Since that series is an AU, those events have no relevance here – it's just a fun Easter Egg to those familiar with my prior fics. Readers seemed to really like Jonathan when they met him in TBW, and he happened to offer some very nice plot device opportunities for OTR, so we jumped at the chance to bring him back. Jonathan is very much based on an awesome guy I know in real life.

7Percent, you invented Jason, didn't you – or, as he was originally called, "Blonde Ripped Dude"?

 ** _7Percent:_** Yep. That soubriquet was yours, I seem to recall. As someone who once used a posh gym in the City of London, I had an image in my mind of the sort of receptionist that would push a few of John's buttons. But, my favourite OC who just has a small but important part to play is Jax.  I like the way she breaks all the stereotypes.

 ** _Jessica:_** She reminds me a bit of Lisbeth Salander.

Creating our murderer was very much a joint effort. Sherlock wasn't very impressed with him, was he?

 ** _7Percent:_** It's what bugged him from the very first sight of Mark Watford's body: what sort of an _idiot_ would do such a thing? It took Sherlock a long time to deduce the motive, when there didn't seem to be any logic. I've always thought that Sherlock might be guilty of "making things complicated" (wasn't that Moriarty's line?) but when murderers are amateurs, they make mistakes.

 ** _Jessica:_** Sometimes it's _really_ hard to tell what is a mistake, and what just might have been an attempt to deliberately mislead the police.

 ** _7Percent:_** Sherlock knew just which buttons to push to get the confession. Why? Because he's been on the receiving end of barbs, too - freak, psychopath, etc. So, getting Cole angry by belittling his intelligence was an obvious tactic for him.

 ** _Jessica:_** It sort of was 'homicidal art by accident' that Cole managed to kill someone in such a fumbly way but still nearly escaped prosecution. It added further insult to injury that Sherlock thought he couldn't catch such a person in the state of recovery he was at that time.

 ** _7Percent:_** "Fumbly"– HAH – one of J's more endearing inventions.  I kept my hands off it, because it actually conveys a lot of meaning.

 ** _Jessica:_** Alright, alright, _'fumbling manner_ ', then. Let me have my occasional ungrammatical quirks and I'll let you keep calling me endearing.  
  
Sherlock's case manager at Harwich is a 100% 7Percent creation. I really like him. I think Mycroft approved of his no-nonsense, gruff approach, since Big Bro would probably think Sherlock needs someone who won't give a toss about the verbal abuse Little Bro is bound to unleash on anyone attempting to help him.

 ** _7Percent:_** Any health professional who takes on Sherlock's case is going to be caught between a rock and a hard place. Or, to use a classical analogy: the Scylla of Mycroft and the Charybdis of Sherlock. One of my own favourite OCs of my own fic universe is Dr Edith Cohen, who _tries_ to be Sherlock's psychiatrist.

 ** _Jessica:_** I think she succeeded quite nicely. She even managed to hold onto her own sanity in the process.  
  
Helen Ellicott was a joint effort to create, but I did draft most of the violin scenes. In my mind's eye, I see her as a mix of Rebecca Hall, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Helen Baxendale and my own violin instructor.

I like the idea that John needed a bit of backup – that there was a need for outside experts in fields where he had little experience. Still, it was John's cleverness that lead to trying out these unorthodox, unexpected things. It was among John's biggest badass moments when he told Mycroft that he was going to do things differently to the older Holmes' earlier approaches, which hadn't been very... _well received._

 ****  
  
Speaking of Mycroft – is he the villain of the story?

 ** _7Percent:_**  NO! Not in my eyes, anyway. When you have a lifetime of caring for someone as challenging as Sherlock, there are bound to be major relationship issues. The battle of wits between the Holmes brothers in Series One and Two were obvious. While Three added nuance to that, it is only in Series Four that we got some backstory about why Mycroft would be quite so obsessed with keeping his little brother under surveillance. OTR was written BEFORE Series Four was broadcast, so we wanted to keep that out of the frame, but still make Mycroft's concern and his assuming the worst the reason why he gets involved in the way he does.

 **Jessica** : Definitely not a villain. We deliberately painted a very meddling, very overbearing, even tyrannical picture of him in OTR, aware that there's a whole separate side to it all which we don't see within that story. He cares deeply, and he's also terribly afraid that a repeat of 2007 is about to happen. His concerns are not overblown, but it's understandable that John, who doesn't have all the information, thinks that Mycroft might just be overreacting a tad bit. Sherlock did share with John one version of what happened back in 2007, but any explanation coming from him should be taken with a grain of salt. He sugar-coats and censors a lot of things when it comes to that particular year.

For most of the OTR writing process, I was a bit conflicted about Mycroft. Then we began exploring the more extensive details of 2007, and now my heart goes out to the poor guy. He's been hurt and shocked and boxed-in and traumatized, too, and him and Sherlock have both entrenched themselves very deep into old assumptions and judgments. Mycroft is good at condescending, and Sherlock is very good at holding grudges. John thus ends up having to be the one to rebuild bridges. Mycroft's one big redeeming feature in OTR is that even despite his worries, he's willing to pass the baton of Sherlock-management to John.

I do sometimes want to shoot paperclips at Mycroft's head. Or possibly let Sherlock do that. He'd like it.

  
  
**The violin plays a prominent part in the story. What can you tell us about that, and the research involved?**

 ** _Jessica:_** The most important part of research was probably yours truly taking up learning to play it! I had never even held one before August 2016, but during the past few years I had gotten very curious as to how it all works. I happened to start lessons around the time that 7Percent insisted that there needed to be a proper sequel. A lot of what goes on in Sherlock's lessons has been influenced by my own beginner's struggles and the wise words of my excellent teacher. The two violins which appear in our various cover photos are mine.

 ** _7Percent:_**  J is the only one I know who takes research so seriously that she is actually learning the violin. (for other reasons, too, but wow does it help the writing!). I hope someday to meet her violin instructor to see if she looks like Helen.

I've been developing a story called "His Last Bow" for the past few months, and the violin bow that it is about.  I've always thought that the violin was just about the only way Sherlock has of expressing his emotion, so it's been a central theme in all my stories.

 ** _Jessica:_** Picking out the music mentioned in the story was fun but took some time. Since I'm a complete beginner it was difficult to gauge the difficulty level of different works composed for the violin. Thankfully there are helpful repertoire lists online, and the thank-you note at the Cardiff Violins website (where the violin used in season 3 was purchased from) mentioned a very specific, rather demanding Bach piece as something Sherlock is ( _was_ ) capable of playing, That was a great help in gauging his skill level.

The Wieniawski polonaise is a relatively modern, flamboyant piece which – even when played well – at times balances at the edge of dissonance. When played rather badly, I imagine it would sound absolutely horrible. I have to say that the chapters detailing Helen's first visit and its aftermath felt very, very harrowing and heartbreaking to write.

 ** _7Percent:_** I am a great fan of violin music. One of my _Ex Files_ ( _Exquisite_ ) is all about Sherlock's violin endeavours as a child.  I am particularly fascinated by the Baroque violin, but also like Lindsey Stirling.

The first draft of the chapter from J where Sherlock realises the consequences of GBS for his playing just ripped my heart out. It made me realise that on top of all the physical transport stuff, his favourite form of communication – the violin – was being denied to him.  If that wasn't enough to make him depressed, I don't know what is. 

 ** _Jessica:_** The Kreisler _Preludium and Allegro_ , which Sherlock is playing in the last violin scene in the story, is one of my favourite violin pieces. It's dramatic and aggressive, yet beautiful and triumphant. It's just the sort of a show-off piece I think Sherlock would enjoy.

  
  
**Are there any stories that have influenced the series?**

 ** _Jessica_** : This fandom is full of absolutely brilliant sickfics, and I'm sure they've all infused into my brain and influenced the way I do these things. I've listed my favourites in my tumblr rec list.

 7Percent's " _Musgrave Blaze_ " may well have influenced the horsing around, at least when it comes to mentioning that Sherlock did that in his youth. Andyoureturntome's " _A Burning Reminder_ " is one of my favourite stories, and there's a tiny bit in chapter one that is sort of a homage to its brilliant opening line. That story very skilfully deals with trauma and long-term pain issues. The way " _Points"_ by lifeonmars makes use of sports might have find some parallel in OTR.

7Percent definitely had a hand in getting me very interested in the ASD. I also love the way she weaves emotional content into casefic.

 ** _7Percent:_** For me, TBW was the inspiration. I don't tend to write "sickfic" per se, but it features as a plot device in a lot of my writing, because I think that the life of an ASD Sherlock is going to involve a lot of difficulties regarding illness and injury. Risk taking, stimulation seeking, inability to communicate with ableist medical professionals- all of that feature.  For the SPD elements of the story, most of my inspiration comes from real medical literature and factual accounts of what it is like. That said, I think BeautifulFiction's _Electric Pink Hand Grenade_ does synaesthesia like no one else can.

 ** _Jessica_** : OOooooo I adore that one, too!

  
  
**Most surprising moments during the writing process?**

 ** _7Percent:_** What wasn't a surprise? The whole process was _amazing_.  Not just when J would come up with something so surprising, but also the times when we would be on live chat and cross-post exactly the same thought- sometimes even the same words.  There were a lot of LOLs, and ROTFLs, I can tell you. And we eventually started calling it a Vulcan Mind Meld.

 ** _Jessica:_** There were definitely some jaw-droppers. 7Percent did some real magic with The Vault – the place turned out to be _very_ different to how I'd imagined it, and the whole locale was turned into a huge puzzle. Another major WTF moment came with the words " _I was Subject Nine._ " It's an eerie feeling, being thrown into a tailspin by one's own story! I also had no inkling the blowjob scene was coming up until I was sent the draft…. *grins*

  
  
**Was there anything you didn't agree on during the writing process – things where Jessica needed to use her veto rights or where Seven needed to put a foot down?**

 ** _7Percent:_**  No. Not one.  I had always had in the back of my mind that this is "her" story, but I did come to the point where I would say it is "ours". Maybe at times we should have been more tough on each other's weaknesses, instead of being as accommodating to our particular indulgences.  Sometimes Britpicking was challenging, but I have lived longer in the UK than I did in the USA (like 2/3rds of my life), so am bilingual in English and American and can argue about vocabulary that would be used and wouldn't be used.

 ** _Jessica:_** I don't remember having a single proper argument during this process. Something that did require some synchronising were Sherlock's sexual history, the shape of the staircase in the chapter where they inspect Watford's body, and the technicalities of duvets. Double-width duvets are the work of the devil, I tell you, as any Scandinavian would. For me, this was our project right from the start, largely because at no point was I presented with any suggestion that made me cringe and go 'nooooooo'.

 

**Best and worst things about writing together?**

**_Jessica:_** The best part was having the chance to talk about a story I was writing almost constantly for months with someone who knew it as well as I did. Seeing someone do stuff with one of my OCs was also amazing, as was seeing every scene and every chapter getting better and better the more we gave them to the other person to tweak. I'm pretty sure 7Percent would like to grumble something about my leapfrog brain and disorganized, non-chronological method of writing?

 ** _7Percent:_**  The best part was getting to know how someone else approaches writing from a completely different process than mine. And learning that those inspirational moments should be embraced with enthusiasm. It has helped my own writing become freer than it was before. The worst part was the fact that we live in two different time zones, and trying the patience of my husband by staying up so late to keep the story going. THE best part was making a new friend for life.

 ** _Jessica:_** I am the world's worst person at keeping secrets (actual quote from a friend: " _You couldn't even keep a jar of jam secret for more than two hours_!"). Keeping the whole thing hush-hush from the fellow authors in our writers' circle, in order to avoid embarrassment if it all went spectacularly belly-up and to alleviate the stress of settling into this huge thing, was neither easy nor fun. We missed out on beta comments from those skilled friends, but on the other hand it still feels sensible in hindsight to have sat on the big reveal for a while, since writing together was technically very complicated to start with, and adding more people into the mix at an early stage would probably have driven me nuts with stress. As for the writing itself, I can't really think of any major downsides. I still can't get over how amicably it all went down and how much fun we had.

  
  
**Personal favourite bits in both stories?**

 ** _7Percent_** **:**   For someone who said she found it hard to write from inside Sherlock's head, TBW was a masterpiece of just that.  The fact that he would not succumb to despair because he held onto John as his anchor was just perfect. The Morse code with the pinky was perfect, as was the word board.  I am a communication specialist in the real world, so this angle was just so interesting to me.

 ** _Jessica:_** Damned difficult question. I very much have a penchant for the bits in TBW where I really let the medical establishment have it. The nocturnal visit from Moriarty was also a lot of fun to do, but I have to say I'm still most affected by the scene where John introduced the talking board. I learned a lot about augmented communication when planning it thanks to a brilliant consultant, and it's a very emotionally brittle and revealing scene.

 ** _7Percent:_** As John would say, "nope. Not going there" regarding OTR.  Too many bits are special to me, and not always for the same reason that a reader would see it. Sometimes, it was just the ability to surprise J with a blowjob or a line of dialogue about "Subject Nine".

 ** _Jessica:_** In OTR, standout bits for me include the night terror scene, John's lonely Indian meal, Sherlock and Sally at Watford's apartment, Sherlock visiting Mycroft, the introduction of The Vault, Helen's first visit, Sherlock breaking Cole's facade in the interrogation room, the meltdown at Barts and the final violin scene. This is probably starting to sound like a list of every damned scene in the story…

  
  
**The ending is left somewhat ambiguous. Does The Fall happen, and would it be different in this 'verse?**

 ** _Jessica:_** I like to think Sherlock has learned some valuable lessons, and that he wouldn't leave John out of the loop this time. In my headcanon, they kick Moriarty's ass as a joint effort and Mary never happens. This probably makes me sound like a romantic, which I think was sort of a requirement for writing this...

 ** _7Percent:_**  Well, I did draft an epilogue, but we decided to leave it out.  In my view, after what they've been through, Sherlock would not have been able to contemplate leaving John behind. No matter how much he wanted to protect him. 

 ** _Jessica:_** We wanted to give readers the option of either sticking with the open ending, or having a peek into the future. That's why there's a short story coming up in our special features which reveals what happened later! Seven's epilogue wasn't deleted, it was simply teleported elsewhere.

  
  
**There are four short stories connected to the larger storyline. How did they come about, and why aren't they part of the main narrative?**

 ** _Jessica:_** They happened, because my beehive brain doesn't know how to let go of things *laughs*. " _A Lighter Kind of Loneliness_ " popped into it one evening when I realised we never gave a reason _why_ Sherlock stopped talking at the age of seven. I'd never depicted him as a child before (7Percent has, many times). It was a thing both challenging and very interesting to do.  

 ** _7Percent:_** Some things are like cutting room floor ideas. But , I wanted to do " _Pressure Point"_ as a way of seeing the sexual relationship from John's POV, because so much of fan fiction obsesses about Sherlock being a virgin and inexperienced, or John having issues about homosexual contact.  But, to me sex between these two would not be the way that a lot of the fandom gets hung up on- the technical or graphic stuff.  They BOTH have serious issues about intimacy of any kind.  So, I wanted to give John a chance to reflect on just how wrong he'd been about what it would be like to love Sherlock.

 ** _Jessica:_** " _The Reichenbach Ascen_ t" is sort of part three of the entire series. I couldn't help wondering what would happen when Moriarty finally waltzes back into their lives: will Sherlock Fall, or do they fall together? My brain ran away with that concept, and I ended up sort of retelling the important bits of the entire episode.

" _Inherently Given_ " is based on the fact that while we did get closure on the violin thing, we didn't get to see to what extent Sherlock eventually regained his skills. The second purpose of that story is to further strengthen the truce and new start his and Mycroft's relationship got in OTR.

 

**What's next for the two of you?**

**_Jessica:_** There's going to be an OTR _spinoff_! Readers were curious about what exactly happened in 2007, and so were we, which is why a story now exists carrying that year as its title.

 _The Breaking Wheel_ & _On The Rack_ are the story of Sherlock&John _2007_ will be the story of Sherlock and Mycroft. At first, we were thinking of a one-shot; that then turned into _'maybe three chapters'_ , which then evolved into a long story in its own right.

 ** _7Percent:_** In part, I am to blame again. I kept nagging J, "But what actually HAPPENED in 2007?" The idea of Sherlock suffering a psychotic break is something I had not written about before. When we started writing, it was in a VERY different style – more impressionistic, and that was fun. Soon after we started answering the question of what happened in 2007, I was forced to quote Brody when he sees Jaws: " _We're going to need a bigger boat_ ".  And we are currently in possession of over twenty chapters of near ready text.

  
  
**What happens next for each of you going forward on a solo basis?**

 ** _7Percent:_**  Some of my readers have noted my "hiatus" from my own universe, which will soon come to an end –I've got WIPS that need finishing.  _Fallen Angel_ is one and _Magpie: Two for Sorrow_ is the other.  There are also new oneshots being planned for _Ex Files_ , _Got My Eye on You_ and _Periodic Tales_ which are already half-formed in my head. I have an _Ex Files Special_ called _Extricate_ which is now four chapters into the ten it will be. It's a 'Sherlock meets Victor' -story. And, as if that wasn't enough, I am also at the planning stages for a whole new story cycle that I will be producing in the autumn, a series called _Amenoi._   It will break the unified universe structure of my writing prior to this, because it will involve four separate stories, one for each of the four "Greek Winds",  to give the POV of Mummy, Sherlock, Mycroft and Eurus on the events that came to light in _The Final Problem_.

 ** _Jessica:_** I have a bunch of solo projects simmering. Lately, I've been better at drafting new stuff than finalising already-drafted things, but I'm going administer a self-kick to the arse and get on with it. The first of my works-in-progress is a light-hearted little story that takes place during S2 and aims to update this fandom's appendicitis fics to portray current medical practices. The second thing I've had going for a long time now – one that still needs a lot of work – is what could be described as Garridebs in Iceland. My third WIP is a curious thing: it happens a few months after _The Final Problem_ , and features John and Eurus as the central characters.

 

**If OTR was a film, which song would play in the end credits?**

**_Jessica & 7Percent _**_[without any hesitation] **:**_ Adam Lambert's " _Underneath_ "!

**_  
_ ** **Some quotes from along the writing process?**

_  
"Our brains are merging, it's like a hallucinogenic original Star Trek episode with some cosmic fungus."_

_  
"Sherlock is being an epic dick in this scene, the one we all know and love."_

_  
"What is it with you and our boys and saunas and bathtubs all of a sudden?"_

_  
"I'm loving full!strop!self!pity!wallow!Sherlock."_

_  
"John must be now much more preoccupied with the meltdown than all the pantslessness."_

_  
"The many typos in this chapter can be explained by the fact that today I outsourced typing to my new fic intern, Grog the Caveman."_

_  
– "Feel free to wrench John's mind out of the gutter."_  
_– "Oh, I want to leave it there, all we need to do is to give it better context!"_

_  
"Fifty Shades of Sulk" - a series of fifty one-shot chapters in which John builds his lexicon of Sherlockian moods."_

_  
"Hey look, it's John's secret Icelandic cousin, Jogn."_

_  
"I originally worried a bit that chapter 14 didn't end in enough of a high note, but it turns out people are really into lip quirks."_

_  
– "Why is Sherlock being so unsympathetic in this scene?"_  
_– "He has soup to stare into, he's busy."_

  
"In this chapter we were supposed to tie the loose ends of the case together, not kick the angst to a whole new redemptory gear!"

  
"I don't know what's more suicidal: trying to have sex with Sherlock Holmes, or trying to TALK about sex with Sherlock Holmes."

_  
"Every time I read this one bit it cracks me up – the “Jewish New Yorker” syntax is just not very Sherlock."_

_  
"Never mind the sex, where's the TALKING???"_

_  
– "I sometimes wonder if the Parental Unit puts Mycroft in charge because they cannot resist Sherlock's ability to manipulate them."_  
_– "Of course. Sherlock flutters those lashes and pouts that cupid's bow and BAM! Everybody gets a polo pony and cocaine."_

_  
– "In this chapter, the readership gets a hefty dose of adorable!dopey!lock. He is adorable, isn't he?"_

_  
– "When he is high everything just gets exaggerated."  
_ _– "Which is why I made him 26% foggier for the latest version of this chapter."_

_  
– "You are the warp and I the weft on this loom"_  
_– "My brain refuses to associate the word warp with anything else than space opera scifi. Wonky loom kink shall be my new AO3 go-to tag."_

_  
"We are the demented demon angst mechanics."_

 

 


	2. Photo posts related to the story

**Here's an index of all the tumblr image posts related to the story.**

**Photos by J. Baillier, except for the post marked with an asterisk, where the photographs were kindly provided by the person credited in the post.**

 

[Mycroft's house at South Eaton Place in Belgravia](http://jbaillier.tumblr.com/post/156307645405/on-the-rack-on-location)

[An example of a Stradivarius photographed at the Ashmolean Museum in Oxford](http://jbaillier.tumblr.com/post/156307645405/on-the-rack-on-location)

[On and around Baker Street](http://jbaillier.tumblr.com/post/156492502470/on-the-rack-on-location-part-2)

[The journey from Baker Street to UCLH](http://jbaillier.tumblr.com/post/156859618925/the-breaking-wheel-on-location)

[UCLH A&E exterior](http://jbaillier.tumblr.com/post/157976336895/on-the-rack-on-location)

*[The A&E and the Acute Medical Unit at UCLH](http://jbaillier.tumblr.com/post/160541130095/on-the-rack-on-location)

[The National Hospital for Neurology and Neurosurgery](http://jbaillier.tumblr.com/post/156859618925/the-breaking-wheel-on-location) part 1

[The National Hospital for Neurology and Neurosurgery](http://jbaillier.tumblr.com/post/157976336895/on-the-rack-on-location) part 2

[Patisserie Valerie](http://jbaillier.tumblr.com/post/157976336895/on-the-rack-on-location)

 

 

 


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